Do adults still have to honor their parents?

Of the Commandment, “Honor Thy Father and Thy Mother”, does this only apply to children or adults as well? What if you are an older adult but one of your parents chooses not to speak to you anymore because of some family issues they are upset about. I would like to have a relationship with my mother but she is upset with me and hasn’t spoken to me for quite some time. I feel guilty about it because of this Commandment but at the same time I know that God knows my heart and knows it’s not my fault and He knows how I would like to be in my mothers life. Can you help me with this?

I appreciate your desire to have a relationship with your mother. The fifth commandment of the Ten Commandments, that asks sons and daughters to honor their parents, is certainly applicable to all children, no matter their age. Indeed, once a daughter, always a daughter! And, once a mother, always a mother!

Therefore, God wants you to honor your mother. The word “honor” in the Bible literally means “to fix a value upon”, “to prize”, and “to revere”. So, whatever the family issues are, find it within yourself to “value”, “prize”, and “revere” your mother, as well as find a way to reconcile with her.

This may mean overlooking an offense as “not worth arguing about anyone”. This may mean confession on your part or hers, but ask God to give grace to do just that. This may mean getting someone to mediate between the two of you, but it will be worth it! One way you can honor your mother is by being the peacemaker and seeking peace between the two of you.

Please read the following Bible verses and pray for God’s guidance to apply them to your situation. Then, go to your mother in love and be reconciled with her (Matthew 5:9, 18:15, Romans 12:18, James 5:16, Proverbs 19:11, and Galatians 6:1).

Life is too short to allow for long-standing conflict in our relationships with those we love!

May the Lord bless you with sweet reconciliation with your mother!

For further information, read The Peacemaker: A Biblical Guide to Resolving Personal Conflict by Ken Sande.